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Control the Fear You Feel

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Fearful or Fearless?

Fear sucks. It’s a universal experience that can paralyze us—the butterflies in the belly, sweaty palms, shallow breathing, and often, anxiety.

These are, as you very likely know, some of the sensations we all experience when we’re deep in the fear loop.

Ya, fear sucks…

But what if you could make fear a resource?

What if you could turn fear into fuel?

When fear becomes the signal to take action—much like a warning light on your car’s dashboard—it becomes an asset.


Start Troubleshooting the Moment the Light Goes On! (The moment you feel fear!)

In keeping with the metaphor, you want to catch things early.

It’s a good thing we feel fear first.

Reread that.

We feel fear first.

It’s the physiological signal we experience before the actual fight (or speech, presentation, showdown, conflict, etc.).

Anything outside your comfort zone can trigger the fear loop.

Let me share a personal story…

Many years ago, before a big presentation, I felt that familiar rush of fear. I had never spoken to over 500 people with live TV present. It was outside my comfort zone.

My heart raced, my palms sweated, and I doubted myself. But instead of letting it paralyze me, I decided to use the fear as fuel. I followed a formula: I considered WHY I was afraid – I peeled that mental onion and identified what was at the core of the fear. Once I explored it and exposed it, I regained my composure and crushed the talk.

Since then, I’ve spent decades studying fear and have created the most effective and simple approach to managing fear.

The formula works for public speaking or managing violence. And it’s part of the big reframe we inspire during our KNOW FEAR® training—how to make fear your co-pilot.

To turn fear into fuel, so you consume it instead of having it eat you up like it does to so many, follow these steps:

  1. Recognize the Fear: You’re beginning to feel fear. Acknowledge it. Say to yourself, “I feel afraid, and that’s okay.”
  2. Take a Deep Breath: This helps to calm your nervous system and brings you back to the present moment.
  3. Reframe the Fear: Tell yourself, “This fear is my body getting ready to perform. It’s my ally, not my enemy.”
  4. Say F*** FEAR: There, feel better? 😬👉Remember, F*** is a powerful acronym:
    • Face it
    • Understand it
    • Control it
    • Know it

To f*** fear, you need to get to know fear.

Next time you feel that rush of anxiety, use these steps. Turn your fear into a signal to take action and move from fearful to fear-less. And if you want more control faster…check out the online course KNOW FEAR!

Coach B

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